The outlook sounded brilliant for the Cottage team this year,

With Trout and Harper on the team, our destiny was clear.

We upgraded our pitching staff by spending lots o’ bucks

Chris Archer, Danny Duffy, Sean Manaea were deluxe.

 

Our rookies, who, this time last year, were in a sorry state:

Max Kepler, Aaron Hicks and Sonny Gray were playing great

Young Luis Severino back together got his act;

He’s been the Yankees’ ace this year, a well-acknowledged fact.

 

The Cottage Cheese (in April) looked a well-oiled machine,

But then in May our fortunes turned; our cows (once fat) now lean.

For Trout has jammed his thumb, and Harper’s hitting has been bleak,

Both Hicks and Duffy down with something called a strained oblique.

 

Pre-season injuries that did not heal as they should,

And several players – let’s just say it – didn’t play so good,

So May was not a happy month for Cottage fans this year.

July and June have come and gone, and now the end is near.

 

Yes, Trout is back, but Harper, hitting well, has hurt his knee

The pitching staff has stunk it up, much to our rivals’ glee

For every Corey Seager, there’s a Maikel Franco too

Plus Travis d. and Logan F. to turn our singing blue

 

And so it was, the other day, inevitably came

The question “Are you selling?” from a team still in the game

Reminding me of April’s dream, of Cottage fans’ delight,

But now eclipsed, this season’s Cheesy hopes plunged into night.

 

But wait! What’s that? It is a Bird, no plane, no superman;

He’s coming back, from ankle woes, and so this Cottage fan

Can finally bench Wil Myers, who, it must be understood

Has blown his chance to prove that he could someday hit with wood.

 

And now Polanco’s found his bat, and Schoop’s still hitting well,

So we can tell our questioner this message: “Go to <some other team for your September needs>”

The Cheese still have a month to go! We’ll get back in this race!

And this lament will have the title “Cottage: In First Place”.