League Updates Uncategorized

“A whole new world of Wolverines awaits you”

Yesterday I got an email with the headline for this update: “A whole new world of Wolverines awaits you.”  And they should know!  The email was from Michigan, the home state of the Old Detroit Wolverines.

Given the steady stream of dismal news from Old Detroit this month, you can imagine how that email uplifted me. Things are over for this year.  The Wolverines dreamed of upsetting the overwhelmingly favored Rosebuds and thought it might be within their grasp when the W’s took over first place on July 31 and held on to it well into September.  But now the dream has withered and crumbled.  There will be no Wolverine championship this year.

But this time “wait ’til next year” isn’t just an empty invocation.  If anything, it’s an understatement, a failure to appreciate the whole new Wolverine world awaiting us.  At a minimum it has to mean a Wolverine championship is coming up next year.  But would that really be a whole new world of Wolverines?  Old Detroit has won championships before, many a time (4, actually). Doing it again would be very pleasant, but it would be a whole old world — a better world from a Wolverine point of view, but not a new one.   So what is awaiting us now must be different (and presumably better) than an isolated championship.

Let’s get this season over with.  I can hardy wait for what awaits us!

….

Dear EFL Answer Man: 

Clearly you’ve misunderstood the prophecy.  The New World of Wolverines is awaiting us.  It doesn’t say anything about us having to wait for It!  We can still win this year, is what it’s saying.

If the National League has ties at the end of the regular season and has to have tie-breaking games, all those games will count as regular season games, right?  That could give the W’s more time to catch the Rosebuds, who are all that stands between us and the Whole New World of Wolverines!

— Pre-Postseason Wolverine Millenialist

 

Dear Pre-Possessed:

We count all stats from regular season games just as MLB does. I believe MLB will count stats from tie-breaking games as regular season stats. I have tried to confirm or disconfirm this, to no avail so far, so the default is that tie-breaker game stats will count in the EFL unless it becomes clear that MLB is not doing that.  All this will become clear after any tie-breaker games.

But either way this is of no value to the Wolverines.  Max Muncy will not save us. Nine Max Muncies will not save us. Don’t sell all your possessions just yet.

— EFL Answer Man

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EFL Standings for 2018
EFL
TEAM WINS LOSSES PCT. GB RS RA
Portland Rosebuds 105 54 .661 887.5 617.8
Old Detroit Wolverines 99 60 .625 5.7 782.8 599.1
Canberra Kangaroos 89 70 .560 16 733.3 653.4
Brookland Outs 87 72 .546 18.3 827.9 763.7
Pittsburgh Alleghenys 87 72 .545 18.5 845.9 778.3
Flint Hill Tornadoes 82 77 .517 22.9 745.7 717.0
Haviland Dragons 78 80 .492 26.9 753.2 762.8
Kaline Drive 74 84 .471 30.1 696.6 739.8
Cottage Cheese 75 84 .469 30.6 749.6 796.2
Peshastin Pears 72 87 .453 33.1 683.6 755.0
D.C. Balk 70 89 .440 35.2 676.9 766.0
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Portland: W, 4 – 4.  (16 PA, .071, .176, .071; 1 ip, 0 er, 0.00 ERA).  The Rosebuds set a new team record for biggest lead in the EFL standings at 5.7 games.  This had nothing to do with the Rosebuds’ performance, and almost everything to do with them getting a game in while the Wolverines were idle.
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Old Detroit:  W (-1), L 1; (-1) – 0. (23 PA, ,227, .261, .273;  0.3 ip, 0 er, 0.00 ERA).  The Wolverines outhit the Rosebuds, but it still wasn’t pretty.  They fell back under 100 wins… but, really, they were probably only at about 99.6 then, and are probably about 99.4 now.
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Canberra: W, 5 – 4. (23 PA, .176, .391, .353;  1 ip, 0 er, 0.00 ERA).
Brookland: W, 5 – 5.  ( 4 PA, .250, .250, 1.000;  7 ip, 3 er 3.86 ERA).
Canberra is doing to Brookland what the Rosebuds are doing to Old Detroit:  zipping past and then burying them.  Brookland’s CJ Cron did all he could to stop the bleeding, but no one else came out to help him. I don’t know whether to be proud of the Captain Kangaroo for so successfully emulating the Rosebuds’ successful blitzkrieg approach, or to be appalled at the Captain Kangaroo for so successfully emulating the Rosebuds’ ruthless blitzkrieg approach.
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Pittsburgh:  W, 6 – 4. (16 PA, .213, .313, .357;  no pitching).  At least the W’s don’t have to worry about another team running them down.  The Outs, on the other hand, now have the league’s most feared franchise — the mighty Alleghenys — breathing down their necks. Even on such an unimpressive day, the A’s gained ground on the Outs.
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Flint Hill:  DNP, 4 – (-1). (21 PA, .350, .381, .850;  1 ip, 0 er, 0.00 ERA). Except for the Outs, every EL team so far has had 1 inning or less of pitching, and surrendered 0 earned runs.  The Tornados combined their one scoreless inning with dynamic, successful pitching to have by far the best Thursday of any EFL team.
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Haviland: DNP, 3 – 3. (16 PA, .133, .188, .200; 0.3 ip, 2 er, 54.00 ERA). Perhaps the Dragons could have managed their pitching to more closely resemble the Tornados’.  But it doesn’t matter: Haviland has seventh place nailed down.
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Kaline: DNP, 3 – 3.  (22 PA, .111, .182, .111; 6 ip, 3 er, 5.40 ERA). Notice how the Drive’s ERA is exactly one-tenth of the Dragons’?  That’s an indication of a rather sizable chulk going on in Haviland. But then, the Drive don’t necessarily have 8th place nailed down yet, so they have more incentive to avoid chulks.
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Cottage: “W”, 5 – 8. (17 PA, .375, .412, .500; no pitching).  It was Edgar Martinez Day in the Cottage, although this is a rather slender Edgar with only 17 plate appearances.  Still, it was enough to keep the Drive in range in case the Cheese would like to do better than 9th place.
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Peshastin: L, 3 – 4. (23 PA, .150, .261, .200; 2 ip, 0 er, 0.00 ERA). A few days ago the Pears were threatening to advance to 9th or even 8th place.  That’s all history now.
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DC:  L, 3 – 9. (12 PA, .200, .333, .200; 3.7 ip, 5 er, 12.27 ERA) I suppose there’s still a chance the Balk could catch the Pears and  for the first time escape ending the season in the cellar.  But it’s going to take some real fireworks this weekend to make that happen.
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Combined MLB + EFL Standings for 2018
AL East
TEAM WINS LOSSES PCT. GB
Boston Red Sox 107 52 .673
Old Detroit Wolverines 99 60 .625 7.6
New York Yankees 98 61 .616 9
Tampa Bay Rays 88 71 .553 19
Flint Hill Tornadoes 82 77 .517 24.8
Toronto Blue Jays 72 87 .453 35
Baltimore Orioles 46 112 .291 60.5
NL East
TEAM WINS LOSSES PCT. GB
Canberra Kangaroos 89 70 .560
Atlanta Braves 89 70 .560 0.1
Washington Nationals 81 78 .509 8.1
Philadelphia Phillies 78 81 .491 11.1
New York Mets 75 84 .472 14.1
D.C. Balk 70 89 .440 19.1
Miami Marlins 62 96 .392 26.6
AL Central
TEAM WINS LOSSES PCT. GB
Cleveland Indians 89 70 .560
Pittsburgh Alleghenys 87 72 .545 2.4
Minnesota Twins 74 84 .468 14.5
Detroit Tigers 64 95 .403 25
Chicago White Sox 62 96 .392 26.5
Kansas City Royals 57 102 .358 32
NL Central
TEAM WINS LOSSES PCT. GB
Chicago Cubs 93 66 .585
Milwaukee Brewers 92 67 .579 1
St. Louis Cardinals 87 72 .547 6
Brookland Outs 87 72 .546 6.2
Pittsburgh Pirates 80 78 .506 12.5
Cottage Cheese 75 84 .469 18.5
Cincinnati Reds 66 93 .415 27
AL West
TEAM WINS LOSSES PCT. GB
Houston Astros 100 58 .633
Oakland A’s 96 63 .604 4.5
Seattle Mariners 86 73 .541 14.5
Haviland Dragons 78 80 .492 22.3
Los Angeles Angels 78 81 .491 22.5
Kaline Drive 74 84 .471 25.5
Texas Rangers 67 92 .421 33.5
NL West
TEAM WINS LOSSES PCT. GB
Portland Rosebuds 105 54 .661
Colorado Rockies 89 70 .560 16.1
Los Angeles Dodgers 88 71 .553 17.1
Arizona Diamondbacks 81 78 .509 24.1
San Francisco Giants 73 86 .459 32.1
Peshastin Pears 72 87 .453 33.1
San Diego Padres 64 95 .403 41.1