EFL Limericks

I wrote these limericks as a kind of penance for having such a disappointing team. My goal with each limerick was to point out ways in which every team has failed, or should fail. And to be funny. Our league is called the EFL. These are the teams in the league: Cottage Cheese (that’s me) […]

Cheese Lament #4 (2014)

I shall be telling this with a sigh In some EFL meeting ages hence: Two players diverged on my squad, and I, I let Altuve travel by, And that has made some difference.   I should be telling this to Karen Who is my wife (she’s Mrs. Cheese): I offered three years to a pitcher […]

Cheese Lament #3 (2013)

Back in 1910 Franklin Pierce Adams published a now-famous poem about baseball that began with the line, “These are the saddest of possible words, Tinker to Evers to Chance.” His poem was inspired by a tragic event: the Cubs had used this new-fangled “double play” to get two of his beloved Giants out on a single […]

Cheese Lament #2 (2012)

Consider the plight of the poor folks in Salem, If it isn’t one thing, another will nail ‘em; Particular? No, they’re not that hard to please, It just that for baseball, they’re stuck with the Cheese.   The Cheese were supposed to be better this year. We’d figured out drafting, the concept was clear. With […]

Cheese Lament #1 (2011)

I have this fantasy baseball team called the “Cottage Cheese.” Cottage because I live on Cottage St. in Salem, and Cheese because it seemed appropriate for Cottage. I’m not very good at fantasy baseball, so each year, around August, when it becomes clear that I (once again) am not going to win, I publish my […]

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