Wednesday morning’s post on Wednesday morning

As Commissioner I never take sides in the pennant race*. All EFL teams* are created equal. The Commissioner’s Office is blind. And so on.

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But I do have to write updates. Good narrative requires conflict and crisis. The biggest prize in our league is the championship, so the biggest story is generally the struggle of every other team to catch the league leader. This story loses its punch if the league leader deserves to be there. So the Commissioner’s Office adopts, for dramatic purposes only, an air of rebellion and lese majeste against whoever is in first**.

If it seems like I slip into an anti-Allegheny tone easier than others perhaps it’s because I have gotten so much more practice.  Consider it a sign of my respect (not to mention envy) for Allegheny accomplishments.  If the inoffensive Pears, Kangaroos, Drive, Rosebuds, Balk, or Tornados start camping in first place they’ll get the same treatment.  I suppose the Cheese should be on this list, too, but their two-year plot to put Trout and Harper on the same team hardly counts as “inoffensive.”

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So when I say “go Tornadoes!” please do not assume I’m only trying to improve the Cheese’s first round 2018 rookie draft pick, which I happen to own. If that were my motive I’d be rooting against the Rosebuds, whose draft pick I also own.  I am  only trying to develop alternate story lines with conflict and significance in case our pennant race peters out or I just need to give the Alleghenys a break.

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Not that I’m thinking about draft picks, but I did make an UNOFFICIAL  estimate of where our picks stand this morning:

Pick Number           Team

2                                       DC

8                                       CK

17                                     PP (from OD)

21                                     PP

22                                    KD

24                                    OD (from PR)

26                                    OD (from CC)

27                                    FH

28                                   HD

29                                   PP (from PA)

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* Except the Wolverines, of course. They are just a little more equal is all.

**  Except the Wolverines, of course. I will remind readers it’s been four years since the W’s have won the EFL championship, so there should be little ground for complaint on this point currently.