Ryan and I are in a trivia league called the Learned League. LL members (called LLamas) participate in four 25-day seasons a year, each day answering 6 questions on any of a vast array of subjects in a head-to-head competition with other league members. One feature of the league is we can set a defense by assigning points our daily opponent can earn for right answers. You want to assign 0 points to the easiest question to answer and 3 to the hardest.
.
Today Ryan mentioned he had set a Rodriguez defense. I had no idea what a Rodriguez Defense might be. I asked him, but he gave me only a truncated answer. (This is, of course, because he is a busy government employee, and so cannot spare time for frivolities like a college professor can. On sabbatical.) I didn’t want to waste any taxpayer dollars with a follow-up question, so I googled it. Here are my results in the order I spotted them on my Google search.
Alex Rodriguez did play defense. It wasn’t what he was known for but he does have the ball in his glove in this photo. But did Ryan sprawl in the dirt to stop his LLama opponent? I can’t envision it. (Or maybe he slapped the ball out of his opponent’s hand as he ran by? Not Ryan’s style, either.)
I believe this general’s name is Rodriguez. I doubt that Ryan resorted to military action to shock and awe his Llama opponent.
Just because I had never heard of Ambrosio Rodriguez doesn’t mean Ryan hasn’t. And Ryan is a lawyer. Perhaps he sued his Llama opponent.
.
Now we’re talking. Maybe Ryan threw out that sneaky Llama for trying to steal the second question.
.
Or maybe Ryan meant he defended all six positions. (Each day’s quiz covers six different subjects, out of a list of 18.) Sean Rodriguez can do that, too.
This shows a crucial point in Women’s International Master Jennifer Perez Rodriguez’ match against some International Master chess player. (Did you expect the international chess organization to even have a clue about how paleolithic it is to have a Women’s International Master play against a regular International Master who is a male? Come on. If 53 years AFTER the Civil Rights Act a major national sports news publication like Yahoo! can’t see why anyone would want to access the Womens’ March Madness without having to burrow through a dozen unpromising links — and doesn’t even offer a Women’s MM pool — how could you expect CHESS to be anywhere near the second half of the 20th century.)
.
Anyway, Rodriguez (playing white) is in trouble. Black has a huge advantage in the pieces he still has, and is one move from checkmating her. Fortunately, Black is in check, and in a bit of a fix of his own. If he moves his king straight back, Rodriguez will check him again with the knight, as shown. At that point Black will have to retreat to the corner, and will be checkmated on the next move. If Black goes into the corner right away, White can force at least a stalemate.
.
Ryan has played some chess in his day, although it’s a family embarrassment that he never made the chess team. Perhaps he means he played defense with a wild, desperate attack that forced his opponent into a blunder. But you can’t really do that in Learned League.
.
This appears to be a photo of an intrasquad game between the Michigan Offense and its Defense. And, of course, the Defense is losing. The article accompanying this link bears the headline “Michigan’s Terrible Defense Isn’t Solely Rodriguez’s Fault.” (The article is seven years old.)
.
Ryan tried to explain that a Rodriguez defense is “Random, because you figure the other player is going to get them all anyway.” Which leads me to believe he’s referring to a Rich Rodriguez defense. Which, at its very best, is a defense that wins until it really matters, at which point it unfailingly loses.
.
I think nine of us here in the EFL can relate.
.
EFL | ||||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB | RS | RA |
Pittsburgh Alleghenys | 101 | 42 | .704 | — | 828.1 | 522.6 |
Flint Hill Tornadoes | 93 | 50 | .653 | 7.4 | 732.6 | 533.9 |
Haviland Dragons | 93 | 50 | .647 | 8.2 | 845.2 | 623.5 |
Cottage Cheese | 88 | 55 | .618 | 12.4 | 761.3 | 592.6 |
Portland Rosebuds | 85 | 58 | .591 | 16.2 | 810.5 | 661.1 |
Peshastin Pears | 79 | 64 | .556 | 21.3 | 720.9 | 653.6 |
Kaline Drive | 78 | 65 | .547 | 22.6 | 707.1 | 646.2 |
Old Detroit Wolverines | 75 | 68 | .528 | 25.3 | 722.7 | 670.6 |
Canberra Kangaroos | 68 | 75 | .479 | 32.3 | 687.9 | 722.3 |
D.C. Balk | 56 | 87 | .392 | 44.7 | 696.3 | 870.5 |
.
Pittsburgh: W, 4 – o. (.278, .333, .472; 17.3 ip, 3 er). Ok, this is getting a little silly. The Alleghenys are 11 – 0 in September. It is SO MUCH HARDER to win 11 straight in the EFL than in MLB. The A’s are doing it because they have outscored their foes 80.1 – 15.0. They have a .966 winning percentage this month. Flint Hill has gone a gallant 7 – 2. The Dragons have done a workmanlike 6 -4. Both of them are sprawling in the dust so far back they can’t even see Pittsburgh from here. No one else is even up to .500 in September. It’s all Alleghenys.
Flint Hill: “L”, 4 – 4. (.132, .214, .289; 14 ip, 9 er).
Haviland: W, 7 – 4. (.286, .342, .600; 4.7 ip 1 er). So now the Tornados and the Dragons are both better than any MLB team. Which sets off all the alarms in the Commissioner’s Office. But on the other hand, it’s looking unlikely that either the Dragons or the Tornados will finish within 10 games of the Alleghenys. Which sets every wastebasket in the Commissioner’s Office afire.
.
Cottage: “L”, 2 – 0. (.264, .304, .377; 24 ip, 11 er). You can’t fool me. That phony “loss” won’t improve the value of that draft pick you traded me.
.
Portland: W, 9 – 6. (.311, .404, .644; 0 pitching). Why can’t you get with the program here and improve your first round rookie draft position (or my benefit)?
.
Peshastin: W (-1), L 2; 3 – 10. (.256, .319, .279; 4.3 ip, 9 er). Yikes — a team chulk. Jarlin Garcia quadruple chulked. Matt Wisler sextuple chulked.
.
Kaline: L, 5 – 10. (.257, .325, .486; 1.3 ip, 3 er). Aaron Judge again: 2 for 2 with 2 homers and a walk.
.
Old Detroit: “L”, 8 – 5. (.343, .425, .629; 12.3 ip, 8 er). I should have traded Bumgarner, too. He’s 11 ip, 11 er so far this month after his 5 ip, 6 er deal yeasterday.
.
Canberra: “L”, 10 – 5. (.407, .467, .815; 9 ip, 5 er) Just think, with more days like that, you coulda been a contender.
.
DC: L, 0 – 1. (.097, .222, .097; 18.3 ip, 5 er). The Balk got 3-hitted by someone.
AL East | ||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
Flint Hill Tornadoes | 93 | 50 | .653 | — |
Boston Red Sox | 81 | 62 | .566 | 12.4 |
New York Yankees | 77 | 65 | .542 | 15.9 |
Old Detroit Wolverines | 75 | 68 | .528 | 17.9 |
Baltimore Orioles | 71 | 72 | .497 | 22.4 |
Tampa Bay Rays | 71 | 73 | .493 | 22.9 |
Toronto Blue Jays | 66 | 77 | .462 | 27.4 |
NL East | ||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
Washington Nationals | 88 | 55 | .615 | — |
Canberra Kangaroos | 68 | 75 | .479 | 19.6 |
Miami Marlins | 68 | 75 | .476 | 20 |
New York Mets | 64 | 79 | .448 | 24 |
Atlanta Braves | 63 | 80 | .441 | 25 |
D.C. Balk | 56 | 87 | .392 | 32 |
Philadelphia Phillies | 54 | 89 | .378 | 34 |
AL Central | ||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
Pittsburgh Alleghenys | 101 | 42 | .704 | — |
Cleveland Indians | 87 | 56 | .608 | 13.7 |
Minnesota Twins | 74 | 69 | .517 | 26.7 |
Kansas City Royals | 71 | 71 | .500 | 29.2 |
Detroit Tigers | 60 | 82 | .423 | 40.2 |
Chicago White Sox | 56 | 86 | .394 | 44.2 |
NL Central | ||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
Cottage Cheese | 88 | 55 | .618 | — |
Chicago Cubs | 77 | 66 | .538 | 11.3 |
St. Louis Cardinals | 75 | 68 | .524 | 13.3 |
Milwaukee Brewers | 75 | 68 | .524 | 13.3 |
Pittsburgh Pirates | 67 | 77 | .465 | 21.8 |
Cincinnati Reds | 62 | 82 | .431 | 26.8 |
AL West | ||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
Haviland Dragons | 93 | 50 | .647 | — |
Houston Astros | 86 | 57 | .601 | 6.5 |
Kaline Drive | 78 | 65 | .547 | 14.3 |
Los Angeles Angels | 73 | 70 | .510 | 19.5 |
Texas Rangers | 71 | 71 | .500 | 21 |
Seattle Mariners | 71 | 72 | .497 | 21.5 |
Oakland A’s | 63 | 80 | .441 | 29.5 |
NL West | ||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
Los Angeles Dodgers | 92 | 51 | .643 | — |
Portland Rosebuds | 85 | 58 | .591 | 7.5 |
Arizona Diamondbacks | 83 | 60 | .580 | 9 |
Peshastin Pears | 79 | 64 | .556 | 12.5 |
Colorado Rockies | 78 | 65 | .545 | 14 |
San Diego Padres | 65 | 79 | .451 | 27.5 |
San Francisco Giants | 56 | 89 | .386 | 37 |
Very creative post today, Ron. Thanks.
Thanks, Tom. But it may have an error. I looked at that chess game some more and I’m not sure white can force a stalemate.
Another — well, not an error, but an egregious understatement. I said the Alleghenys had an 11-game win streak as of Monday morning. That was true — but it left out the four games they won to close out August.
Their streak was really 15 games long Monday morning. They had not lost since August 27.