I am so confused

How am I confused?  Let me count the ways.

1.  I hosted an open mic post yesterday. I invited everyone to comment. I predicted 3 would, plus maybe a couple of blurts (short comments).  It got 14 views.  Only 4 of those were me, eager to read your comments.  But no one commented.  Such a generous invitation, universally declined. Why?  Was it something I said? Was it the Wolverines climbing a game ahead in first place?  Were you busy attending National I Love My Dentist Day festivities?  Having gone to my dentist three days in a row last week, I’m kind of over him now… but I guess I can sort of understand how someone might have your priorities.  

 

 

2.  Yesterday the Tornados traded Jameson Taillon to the Seraphim for Sean Manaea. The Assistant Commissioner for IT couldn’t contain himself. “Those Tornadoes are a bunch of wily dudes. What will they think of next?”   But I don’t get it. 

1. • Taillon pitched last night , a perfect game into the 7th inning. He finished with 8 ip, 1 er.  Manaea also pitched last night. He covered 6 ip, 1 er. Both excellent outings. 
   • Manaea, after last night, has 62 innings of 3.77 ERA, just under his 3.87 career ERA.  Taillon has covered 58.7 innings, for a  2.30 ERA, but his career ERA is 3.72.  
   • BP forecasts Taillon to be worth 1.0 wins above replacement for the rest of the season. Fangraphs says it will be 1.3 WAR.  BP says Manaea will be worth 1.7 WARP for the rest of the season.  Fangraphs agrees.  
   • Taillon is on a 2024 contract for $5,250,000.  Manaea is on a 2023 contract for $6,000,000.  
   • The Seraphim, after the deal, have $1,750,000 to spend in the draft Saturday, up from $1,000,000.  The Tornados have $3,500,000, down from $4,250,000.
   • Taillon is 30 years, 6 months, 15 days old.  Manaea is 30 years, 4 months, 1 day old. 
   • Taillon is 6′ 5″. 230 pounds.   Manaea is 6′ 5″, 245 pounds. Most of those extra 15 pounds is probably hair.
   • Taillon is pale, neatly groomed.  Manaea is brown, tattooed, with wild hair he still has not cut despite my instructions. 
   • Other than melanin count and grooming, they are pretty close to being the exact same very good late-blooming pitcher. This isn’t the Tornados packing it in and playing for the future — they gave away a year of the future, and both teams are pretty much as good now as they will be tomorrow when June begins and the trade takes effect. The only angle I can see for cleverness is giving the Seraphim 75% more to spend and the better ERA so far… but how is that clever for the Tornados?   Maybe Dave will elaborate on the wiliness of the Tornados.
   • Or maybe the Archangel is the clever one?? Wheels within wheels?
   • I just noticed: the Tornados have already played the Yankees, who are still awaiting their matchup with the Seraphim. Perhaps the Tornado brass noticed that having key players on the opposing MLB team tends to dampen risk. If our roster matched the MLB team’s roster perfectly (and we used our players like they did), we’d be guaranteed to have a .500 winning percentage for the series. Maybe moderating risk a tiny bit is the wily part of this deal.  But a glance at the standings suggests moderating risk may not be the best approach for either team. It isn’t time to panic yet– not for quite awhile — but generally playing conservative is a strategy for people in the lead. 
   • Maybe the cleverness will be revealed later in the season when both teams catch the Wolverines, the Tornados tossing them in the air, where the Seraphim grab them and drop them into a deep canyon somewhere.  Maybe so — but then what?   There’s no such thing as co-champions in the EFL.
   • Or as Gandalf put it to Saruman:  There is only one Lord of the Ring, only one who can bend it to his will, and he does not share power.

3.  The Alleghenys are suddenly a great team! Their raw winning percentage this week is .719. That’s good for 116.6 wins over the season, breaking not only the Alleghenys’ own EFL record (115) but also the Mariners all-time record 116 wins.  When the week began they were 15 – 33, two games worse than any other MLB or EFL team.  And that was with a 0.013 boost in their adjusted winning percentage from playing slightly worse than .500 teams. Their raw winning percentage (.291) would be more likely to produce a 14-34 record. 

But now the A’s are 5/6 of the way through a week when they have the 4th best raw winning percentage in the EFL and the third highest adjusted winning percentage at .862, good for 139.7 wins over a full season.  They’ve won 4.3 out of 5 games this week, leapfrogging over the Royals, the Nationals, and the also-“surging” Reds.  There has been no change in the roster. I don’t even think there were any changes in the allocations.

The only difference?  Mark W. has been home all week.  Notice: “home” means “Oregon”, not “Pittsburgh.”   But apparently that’s better than being in Ireland.  I have no idea why that should be the case — why Mark’s physical location should have any effect on a fantasy team “located” either 2000 miles away, or nowhere. I don’t get it.

 

4.  Maybe it’s something in the Pittsburgh water? The almost-as-lowly Pirates just finished a 3-game sweep of the Dodgers!  Although, if it IS the water, the Pirates had to bring it with them, since that series was in LA. With both their hitherto-struggling teams on tears this week, Pittsburgh baseball fans must be  euphoric.

 

5. I also don’t get the Wolverines’ sudden surge. After spending 6 weeks entangled with the Balk – mostly being a half-game behind them — the W’s in the last two days have leapt away to a 2.2 game lead, the largest anyone has had since the Balk’s 2.9-game lead at the end of Week 2. 

The surge began three days ago, when the Ws were still about a half-game behind the Balk. Since then five W pitchers have combined for just 13.7 innings, but zero earned runs.  And the offense has simmered along at a .284, .366 .450 pace, led by Austin Riley’s breakout from a long slump.  Riley’s line over the last three days is .500, .533,.857:  7 for 14 with two doubles, a homer, and a walk.  Also, there’s Balk cast-off Sam Huff, OPSing 1.030 over the last three days, an uptick from what he’s been doing all year (.847). 

6. Huh. Detroit’s other team, the Young Tigers (only 122 years old), has gone 4- 1 this week on their own surge. So both Pittsburgh and Detroit, both reality and fantasy, are under whatever spell is causing these surges. 

7.  How are the Cascades getting such good pitching results?  They seem to have only one functioning starting pitcher: Dakota Hudson.  DeSclafani is injured, and Tucker Davidson has not appeared this week.  Hudson pitched well this week — 7 ip, 1 er — but the other eight Cascade hurlers all seem to have pitched in relief, combining for 13.7 ip and 4 earned runs.  The actual Cascade pitchers have a 2.17 ERA this week, elevated to a still-solid 3.74 ERA by 14.3 replacement innings. 

8. Why do we call the people attending an event “attendees”?  They should be attenders. The people they are there attending should be the attendees.  People who are “ees” are objects of the verb: an employee is being employed. A payee is being paid. An assignee is receiving an assignment.  But attendees are GIVING attendance, not receiving it. It just makes no sense.

9.  I understand why people don’t like tea.  It’s brown bitter water.  Ted Lasso is right.  But how can people who don’t like tea like coffee? Coffee is even MORE bitter, with an aftertaste to boot!  I  just don’t get the attraction — other than the smell, which is, admittedly, pretty good. But there are many great smelling things we would never put in our mouths.  Like dirt after a summer rain shower.

10. Why is it fashionable these days for people in theater to spell it “theatre”?  The spelling makes no sense.  It’s pure pretension. To being English!  It’s monarchistic, anti-democratic, un-American. And inexplicable.  It’s another thing that makes me a confusee. 

 

 

 

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