Yesterday James Paxton took the baseball player – bird relationship into an entirely new phase. Dave Winfield executed a seagull. Randy Johnson destroyed a dove.
But Paxton stood patiently in the Minnesota outfield while a juvenile bald eagle tried to perch on his shoulder. He was the working father to the child in the lap with crayons. He was the son to the elderly parent repeating a tale for the fortieth time. He was the gentle dog with the toddler crawling all over him.
He was the Portland Rosebuds indulgently letting the little people sit in the catbird seat for a week. And I mean that in more ways than might at first appear.
If Paxton deserves the Kindness to Crazy Birds award, the Rosebuds deserve and award, too. I’ll explain in a little bit.
EFL Standings for 2018
| EFL | ||||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB | RS | RA |
| Old Detroit Wolverines | 5 | 2 | 670 | 0 | 27.8 | 19.5 |
| Canberra Kangaroos | 4 | 2 | .681 | 0.1 | 37.6 | 25.8 |
| Portland Rosebuds | 5 | 2 | .653 | 0.1 | 32.8 | 23.9 |
| Kaline Drive | 4 | 3 | .634 | 0.6 | 33.2 | 25.2 |
| Pittsburgh Alleghenys | 3 | 3 | .561 | 1.2 | 27.5 | 24.3 |
| Brookland Outs | 3 | 3 | .535 | 1.4 | 28.2 | 26.3 |
| D.C. Balk | 3 | 3 | .458 | 1.8 | 23.5 | 25.6 |
| Cottage Cheese | 2 | 4 | .402 | 2.2 | 23.9 | 29.1 |
| Flint Hill Tornadoes | 3 | 4 | .401 | 2.3 | 26.9 | 32.8 |
| Haviland Dragons | 2 | 5 | .311 | 2.9 | 31.5 | 46.8 |
| Peshastin Pears | 1 | 6 | .187 | 3.8 | 17.1 | 35.8 |
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Old Detroit: W, 4 – 3. (.211, .333, .263; 1 ip 0 er). Shane Greene’s masterful three-strikeout inning of work (albeit with one walk) secured the Wolverine win and one more day in first place.
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Canberra: L, 1 – 5. (.143, .250, .310; 6.7 ip, 4 er). By contrast, Carson Smith’s nasty little chulk (1 ip, 2 er) sank the Canberra catamaran.
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Portland: “W”, 2 – 4. (.364, .417, .455; 0 ip, 0 er) John must be very proud. His eldest son won the very first GOOD Award as the Goodest Owner Of the Day. Now his second son is the second GOOD Award winner.
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What did Mark do? He is always one of the most active owners doing his part in the EFL Error Correction process. (You know: 1. Commissioner errs. 2. Another owner finds the error, and alerts the Commissioner. 3. Commissioner fixes the error. 4. Repeat.)
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This morning I completed an update and the standings appeared on the website showing the Rosebuds in first place. Soon thereafter I got this poignant note from the Rosebud front office:
Hello
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This may affect my first place standing…but, I noticed that Marjama and Tauchman should be allocated, but are not showing those allocations on the stats page.
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Also, Villar is missing from my stats page entirely…
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Thanks
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And he was right! Michaels Marjama and Tauchman were not appearing in the stats because BP called them Michael while our database thought of them as Mike. And Jonathan Villar WAS missing entirely because I had only processed the Villar/Sheffield page on the database, but not in Baseball Prospectus.
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Those three worthies have combined so far to go 8 for 29 with one double and now walks: .276, .276, 310. This dismal result, not far from replacement level, dropped the Rosebuds by about 0.4 games in the standings, tumbling them all the way to third place (by a hair).
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So, for honesty even when it hurts, and additionally in recognition of his yeoman error correction work, Mark Johnson is our second GOOD Award Winner.
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Which is kind of annoying. I am all ready to grumble and moan when the Rosebuds finally take over first place. But now can I begrudge him first place in the standings NOW? I wonder if by tomorrow I can get over this irritating burst of good feelings toward the Rosebuds.
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Kaline: W (-1), L 1; (-2) – 1. (.256, .304, .349; 5 ip, 2 er). Paxton “recovered” from being the eagle’s perch to pitch 5 strong innings, but the Dragons’ Sano still blasted a homer and the Mariners still lost.
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Pittsburgh: “L”, 5 – 2. (.367, .367, .600; 14 ip, 4 er). The Alleghenys surged back upward with a strong game on both sides of the ball. The only glitch was Stephen Strasburg’s 6 ip, 4 er.
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Brookland: L, 4 – 6. (.167, .250, .375; 6.7 ip, 4 er). Supposed superstar Manny Machado went 0 for 4 to lower his season line to .222, .323, .259. I have nothing against Machado. He served the W’s well for 4 1/2 years. We wish him well again just as soon as his Brookland contract is over.
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DC: “W”, 5 – 7. (.267, .389, .333; 9.3 ip, 5 er). Kind of a middling day in DC. Good enough to fool the official scorekeeping into awarding a win, but just bad enough to make the win artificial.
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Cottage: L, 1 – 5. (.167, .211, .222; 1 ip, 0 er) We sure seem to be seeing a lot of low-scoring games. The weather?
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Flint Hill: L. 1 – 3. (.125, .163, .250; 7.7 ip, 3 er).
Haviland: DNP, 0 – 4. (.174, .269, .348; 1.7 ip, 4 er).
Peshastin: L, 1 – 7. (.167, .306, .167; 0.3 ip, 0 er). It’s not that I don’t have witty things to say, nor that these low-end teams don’t deserve more attention. It’s that I need to leave RIGHT NOW to run the errands I promised before I go to Melanie’s Book Signing Event at Chapters. I’m not angling for a GOOD award or anything, but if it comes down to my wife’s book launch, or three laggard EFL teams’ commentary…
Combined MLB + EFL Standings for 2018
| AL East | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Boston Red Sox | 6 | 1 | .857 | — |
| Old Detroit Wolverines | 5 | 2 | .670 | 1.3 |
| Toronto Blue Jays | 4 | 3 | .571 | 2 |
| New York Yankees | 4 | 3 | .571 | 2 |
| Flint Hill Tornadoes | 3 | 4 | .401 | 3.2 |
| Baltimore Orioles | 2 | 5 | .286 | 4 |
| Tampa Bay Rays | 1 | 6 | .143 | 5 |
| NL East | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| New York Mets | 5 | 1 | .833 | — |
| Canberra Kangaroos | 4 | 2 | .681 | 0.9 |
| Atlanta Braves | 4 | 2 | .667 | 1 |
| Washington Nationals | 4 | 3 | .571 | 1.5 |
| D.C. Balk | 3 | 3 | .458 | 2.3 |
| Philadelphia Phillies | 2 | 4 | .333 | 3 |
| Miami Marlins | 2 | 5 | .286 | 3.5 |
| AL Central | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Minnesota Twins | 4 | 2 | .667 | — |
| Pittsburgh Alleghenys | 3 | 3 | .561 | 0.6 |
| Chicago White Sox | 3 | 3 | .500 | 1 |
| Detroit Tigers | 2 | 4 | .333 | 2 |
| Cleveland Indians | 2 | 4 | .333 | 2 |
| Kansas City Royals | 1 | 3 | .250 | 2 |
| NL Central | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Pittsburgh Pirates | 5 | 1 | .833 | — |
| Milwaukee Brewers | 4 | 3 | .571 | 1.5 |
| Brookland Outs | 3 | 3 | .535 | 1.8 |
| Chicago Cubs | 3 | 3 | .500 | 2 |
| St. Louis Cardinals | 3 | 4 | .429 | 2.5 |
| Cottage Cheese | 2 | 4 | .402 | 2.6 |
| Cincinnati Reds | 1 | 4 | .200 | 3.5 |
| AL West | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Houston Astros | 6 | 1 | .857 | — |
| Los Angeles Angels | 5 | 2 | .714 | 1 |
| Kaline Drive | 4 | 3 | .634 | 1.6 |
| Seattle Mariners | 3 | 3 | .500 | 2.5 |
| Texas Rangers | 3 | 5 | .375 | 3.5 |
| Oakland A’s | 3 | 5 | .375 | 3.5 |
| Haviland Dragons | 2 | 5 | .311 | 3.8 |
| NL West | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Arizona Diamondbacks | 6 | 1 | .857 | — |
| Portland Rosebuds | 5 | 2 | .724 | 0.9 |
| Colorado Rockies | 4 | 3 | .571 | 2 |
| San Francisco Giants | 3 | 3 | .500 | 2.5 |
| Los Angeles Dodgers | 2 | 5 | .286 | 4 |
| Peshastin Pears | 1 | 6 | .187 | 4.7 |
| San Diego Padres | 1 | 6 | .143 | 5 |