Cottage Blog Poetry

11th Annual Cheese Lament

Twenty-one pitchers have pitched for the Cheese
One could say most of them failed to please
Six of them languish right now on the VIL
Not helping any, but still on the bill.

But Shohei and Robbie and Collin and Tai
Have powered Cheese pitching to a seasonal high
In August they’ve got it together at last
Along with some new guys in Cottage’s cast:
Josiah, and Alek, those fine debutants
Have done the job well, and that’s what the boss wants.

The hitting’s been poorer than what we expected
The big bucks for Bohm were poorly invested
Nimmo gets on base, but can’t slug the ball;
Garcia’s done nothing, no nothing at all.

Arozarena’s name takes a whole line,
And someday he’s going to be mighty fine,
McNeil’s supposed to be better than this,
But Shohei’s a wonder; his presence is bliss.

Our pitching has brought us from tenth place to seventh
Like Kaline, we’re happy to not be eleventh
To get to the middle, we have to get past
The Dragons, who seem to be sinking so fast
Our chances of winning the league might be slim
But next year – just wait! – you will hear the Cheese Hymn.


  • So good I hate to break the spell with a comment. But you deserve to know how delightful it is.

    And I am happy to wait to hear the Cheese hymn. Next year I’ll be ready, if you are.

  • Dave, this is so good! In fact, it is too good. I think the universe conspires against you in order for these to continue to be birthed into our world. Next year I hope we get a hymn, but I have to imagine it won’t be as good as a lament – for out of pain comes true brilliance, while out of pleasure comes only complacency.