Here’s a quick trivia quiz: who famously said “¿Por qué no te callas?” to whom in 2007?
I will let you ponder this while I drone on about something or other.
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(Hint — Neither of the parties to the famous quote is in the EFL, although one played baseball, competing in a national championship tournament.)
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Sometimes it is better to just shut up. (Hint: the quote, in English, is “Why don’t you be quiet?” or “Why don’t you shut up?”) For example:
- I should have shut up rather than gushing to Melanie “These muffins are better than the ones you usually make!” (“These” muffins were made from a mix in a box. She usually made muffins from scratch.)
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Below I will discuss some things better left unsaid. Further below I will give you the answer to the quiz. To be safe, try to decide your answer before you look at today’s standings. (Hint: the quote uses the second person familiar pronoun “te” (a form of “tu”), usually used within one’s family. In public it would be used typically by adults addressing children.) (Which, in the case of this quote, was especially insulting.)
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EFL | ||||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB | RS | RA |
Pittsburgh Alleghenys | 82 | 39 | .680 | — | 693.2 | 472.4 |
Flint Hill Tornadoes | 78 | 44 | .643 | 4.3 | 636.5 | 472.7 |
Haviland Dragons | 79 | 44 | .639 | 4.6 | 733.8 | 549.6 |
Cottage Cheese | 77 | 45 | .635 | 5.3 | 662.7 | 498.0 |
Portland Rosebuds | 72 | 49 | .595 | 10.3 | 700.5 | 567.6 |
Kaline Drive | 70 | 53 | .568 | 13.4 | 613.4 | 532.3 |
Peshastin Pears | 67 | 54 | .551 | 15.6 | 591.3 | 540.6 |
Old Detroit Wolverines | 64 | 58 | .529 | 18.3 | 608.3 | 560.0 |
Canberra Kangaroos | 57 | 64 | .468 | 25.7 | 578.7 | 618.4 |
D.C. Balk | 47 | 74 | .391 | 35 | 605.3 | 757.7 |
AL East | ||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
Flint Hill Tornadoes | 78 | 44 | .643 | — |
Boston Red Sox | 70 | 52 | .574 | 8.5 |
New York Yankees | 66 | 56 | .541 | 12.5 |
Old Detroit Wolverines | 64 | 58 | .529 | 14 |
Baltimore Orioles | 60 | 63 | .488 | 19 |
Toronto Blue Jays | 59 | 64 | .480 | 20 |
Tampa Bay Rays | 60 | 65 | .480 | 20 |
NL East | ||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
Washington Nationals | 73 | 48 | .603 | — |
Miami Marlins | 59 | 62 | .488 | 14 |
Canberra Kangaroos | 57 | 64 | .468 | 16.4 |
Atlanta Braves | 54 | 67 | .446 | 19 |
New York Mets | 54 | 67 | .446 | 19 |
D.C. Balk | 47 | 74 | .391 | 25.7 |
Philadelphia Phillies | 44 | 77 | .364 | 29 |
AL Central | ||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
Pittsburgh Alleghenys | 82 | 39 | .680 | — |
Cleveland Indians | 68 | 53 | .562 | 14.3 |
Minnesota Twins | 62 | 59 | .512 | 20.3 |
Kansas City Royals | 61 | 61 | .500 | 21.8 |
Detroit Tigers | 53 | 69 | .434 | 29.8 |
Chicago White Sox | 46 | 74 | .383 | 35.8 |
NL Central | ||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
Cottage Cheese | 77 | 45 | .635 | — |
Chicago Cubs | 65 | 57 | .533 | 12.5 |
Milwaukee Brewers | 64 | 60 | .516 | 14.5 |
St. Louis Cardinals | 63 | 60 | .512 | 15 |
Pittsburgh Pirates | 59 | 64 | .480 | 19 |
Cincinnati Reds | 53 | 71 | .427 | 25.5 |
AL West | ||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
Haviland Dragons | 79 | 44 | .639 | — |
Houston Astros | 76 | 47 | .618 | 2.7 |
Kaline Drive | 70 | 53 | .568 | 8.8 |
Los Angeles Angels | 63 | 60 | .512 | 15.7 |
Seattle Mariners | 63 | 61 | .508 | 16.2 |
Texas Rangers | 61 | 61 | .500 | 17.2 |
Oakland A’s | 53 | 70 | .431 | 25.7 |
NL West | ||||
TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
Los Angeles Dodgers | 87 | 34 | .719 | — |
Portland Rosebuds | 72 | 49 | .595 | 15 |
Colorado Rockies | 68 | 55 | .553 | 20 |
Peshastin Pears | 67 | 54 | .551 | 20.3 |
Arizona Diamondbacks | 67 | 56 | .545 | 21 |
San Diego Padres | 55 | 68 | .447 | 33 |
San Francisco Giants | 50 | 75 | .400 | 39 |
Your storytelling exceeds your memory, O Chief Commenter. *I* was the one who said “Zimmer for the minimum.” Jamie was the one who checked my budget and carefully placed his bid slightly higher, taking advantage of my poor estate. So he gets only what he deserves.
I am conflicted, however, because at the moment he has the best chance of fulfilling the Pittsburgh Pronouncement. So I am rooting for Flint Hill, until the Cheese take over in September.
I regret saying to myself “I think I’ll allocate both Fuller and McHugh at 33% this month.” 13 shutout innings yesterday x .33 = sadness.