Dave’s Pearls of Drafting Wisdom

The posting of the final free agent list always conjures up for me visions of future Cheese (make that triumphant Cheese) all grouped together for that team photo with the trophy. As I pore over the list, practically drooling over some of the tidbits dangled thereon, I have to warn myself: hold on, boy. Steady. Remember the Alamo (or in my case, the Buchholz).

So as much for my own benefit as anyone else’s, and to totally give away my strategy before the draft, I offer you Dave’s Pearls of Drafting Wisdom.

I know there’s not much danger of your over-valuing these gems, but in case you consider adopting any of them, remember that the Cheese have NEVER posted a winning season. Yet we persist.

Without further ado, the Pearls:

1. Never offer more than two years to a starting pitcher. (See aforementioned Buchholz, C., and Haren, D.)
2. If you MUST offer more than two years to a starting pitcher, at least wait until the lumbering galumphs you now possess have moved on.
3. Never draft a relief pitcher based on last year’s amazing record. These things happen, but seldom more than once. It’s Random Chance, and you can’t predict it.
4. Never drop a player with a starting job. There’s a reason they have it. (See Altuve, Jose.)
5. Never trade away your first-round rookie draft pick. (See Morrison, Logan.)
6. Never panic just because you didn’t get the shortstop you wanted. (See Hecchavaria, Adeiny.) There will always be more shortstops.
7. Always draft extra starters. Arms fall off at an alarming rate sometimes. (See Mock, Ron.)
8. Do not fall in love with worthless former prospects just because you made the mistake of drafting them. Be ruthless. Excise the scum.

What Pearls have you to offer?